In this edition: Players who should win American Idol, the jacket heard round the world, and a golden retriever steals the show (naturally).
Endzone Astrology
Here’s what you *actually* need to know about the QBs of the 4 teams most likely to make it to the Superbowl:
Capricorn sun and Virgo moon Brock Purdy (49ers QB) is a frontrunner for MVP. Why? Because the boy is career-focused!! Those are two strong earth signs. We’ll bet you anything the boy has a 24/7 tummy ache. He’s ANXIOUS. But organized, analytical, and grounded. He and his team have the highest chances of winning the Big Game after all!
ALSO a Capricorn sun, Lamar Jackson (Ravens QB) is a bit louder and more excitable than Brock. His moon sign is Sagittarius, which gives him a positive, happy-go-lucky outlook on life. Combined with his sun sign, he seems like an emotionally passionate and loud guy. He’s definitely a big contender and one to look out for.
Buffalo Bills QB Josh Allen is a Gemini sun and Cancer moon. Geminis are famously creative!! But with a cancer moon? That’s an interesting mix. Cancer moons can be protective, introspective, and extremely emotionally sensitive (boyfriend note: “oh yeah, he’s a huge crybaby”). He might feel kind of misunderstood emotionally (although not by his gf, none other than Hailee Steinfeld— we had to name drop), but on the field he can show off his innovative play strategy. I won’t drop boring stats, but he’s the first quarterback in NFL history to have some impressive feats like most passing and rushing yards. You gotta be creative and emotionally brave for that!!
Pat Mahomes is a Virgo sun and Cancer moon. (Ma)Homie is a homebody and pretty emotional and tender. His Virgo sun means he’s grounded, straightforward, and organized as well as stubborn and passionate. Once he finds the things he likes, he’s gonna put his all into sticking with it. Like his high school sweetheart turned wifey, Brittany Mahomes, and, of course, football. He might enjoy the more analytical and strategic part of the game, but don’t worry, he’s also a goofball, as evidenced by his silly voice (trust, the man sounds like Kermit the frog) and quippy responses to interviewers.
(source - we researched this if you even care)
Things We Obviously Love: Players who can serenade us
We know the Boys are all amazing football players. Big whoop, good for you. Here’s the real tea: it’s been brought to our attention that there are a few players who also have some serious pipes. Grab a blankie because you’re about to have goosebumps :’)
First, there’s Kobie Turner, defensive tackle for the L.A. Rams, who is also an incredible singer! He was even offered a music scholarship in college. (He turned it down beccause he also got a football one, nbd.) The dude was in not one, but THREE a capella groups in college. One of his a capella friends said, “‘I didn’t even know him at all as a football guy….He was a music guy.’” Lolz. His college football teammates, on the other hand, called him “The Conductor.” We want an A24 indie romcom about a guy who has to balance football, a secret singing career, and his latest crush. I might be describing High School Musical… but this version is adults? And they’re in the NFL? Are any of our readers movie producers? Call us.
Check it, and get ready to swoon:
Next we have Justin Tucker, kicker for the Baltimore Ravens. Move over Mariah Carey, this man is a lit’ral trained opera singer!! He actually studied music in college, spending his senior year with a globally recognized opera professor who taught him the style known as bel canto, which means “beautiful singing” in Italian. And HOO boy does that check. He even won the coveted title of “Most Valuable Performer” on an NFL player talent show in 2018. (HOW DID WE MISS THIS!!) He’s also apparently the literal best kicker of all time? It boggles our brain how one person can be so good at multiple things. That shouldn’t be allowed. We’re crying at his rendition of Ave Maria???? Help??
Honorable mention goes to Dolphins QB Tua Tagovailoa whose Pisces creativity is showing with his darling ukulele skills:
Was Taylor at the Game?
Le duh. And to brave the -7ºF game(!), she wore the cutest custom-made jacket with Travis’s name and number on it. It was created and designed by Kristin Juszczyk, wife of a player on the 49ers. Women supporting women …supporting men! AKA the plot of Barbie. Kristin also made one for Taylor Lautner (omg), Brittany Mahomes, and Simone Biles! Taylor (Swift) and Brittany were adorbs dancing and hanging together at the game in their matching jackets repping their lovers and swag surfin.
Most supportive husband award goes to Kyle Juszczyk (Kristin’s husband), who was literally all over Twitter commenting and making sure everyone knew who made Taylor’s jacket. <3333
Also at the game, meet Ben, the real star of the college football season finale (I mean championship). The internet has become obsessed with this cutie pup who, turns out, has nothing to do with college football but actually belongs to commentator Kirk Herbstreit. Fans loved seeing this little guy along the sidelines all season, and he rightfully stole the show. Puppy (or old dog) bowl 2024 here he comes!!
Not at the game, Bill Belichick, who your dad/bf/brother(/sister, hi, Kerri) is either crying about or celebrating. If you need to make small talk with someone about sports, this is your in. They’ll probably try to start predicting this dude’s next move, but you can just focus on his incredible fashion sense (not), which consists exclusively of poorly cut-up sweatshirts for some reason.
Athlete couple of the week
And the award this week goes tooooooo: TWO-TIME WNBA CHAMPION KELSEY PLUM of the Los Vegas Aces and her husband of the NY Flops Giants, Darren Waller. We came across this photo from last year of them hugging after Kelsey won the WBNA championship for the second time in a row(!!!), and we’re crying at how cute they are. Their support for each other is what Hallmark movies are made of, with both of them talking about how long-distance (her team is in Vegas and his in NY) has made them better communicators and more attentive partners. Sweetie pies!
(P.S. We cannot wait for WNBA season. That is a sport we can actually all get behind!!)
That’s all for now! I just tried to google what a third and long is and got bored. Time for a nap.
xoxo good game Maddie and Kelsey